From Muddy Water
The Blind Men and the Elephant
There is a famous story that originated in South Asia around the time of the Buddha. In this story, a clever king had his minister gather a group of blind men in his courtyard. The men, being blind from birth, had never seen or approached an elephant. The king asked the blind men what the elephant was like.
Each blind man reached out and touched a different part of the elephant. One grasped the trunk and said, “An elephant is like a thick snake.” Another felt a tusk and said, “No, it is sharp and hard – like a spear.” A third placed his hand on the ear and said, “You’re both wrong – it’s wide and thin, like a fan.” Another felt the leg and insisted, “It’s like a sturdy pillar.” One held the tail, saying, “Clearly, it’s like a rope.” Another patted the side of the elephant: “You’re all mistaken – it’s like a great wall.”
Soon, they began to argue. Each blind man was stubbornly convinced that he alone was right. After enjoying the scene, the king explained to the blind men that they were all partially right and partially wrong.
This story illustrates that while our perception or subjective experience may be accurate, we may lack understanding of the larger truth.
Bio-Psycho-Social Model of Human Development
We may be like the blind men when it comes to understanding our own minds and our behaviors. Unsurprisingly, human behavior is complex, and we may not be aware of the numerous factors that influence our actions.
A combination of biological, psychological, and social factors influences our behaviors. Not only do these factors influence our behaviors, but they also influence each other, which further complicates why we think, feel, and act in ways that are not in our best interests.
One common problematic behavior is chronic procrastination. A biological influence may be an ADHD diagnosis, which validates difficulty concentrating. A psychological influence is the satisfaction that comes from completing your work with minimal preparation. A social influence may be the praise you receive from your teacher, peers, or boss – even though they may not be aware you rushed through the work in the last moment.
Lastly, if your teacher or boss does not reprimand you for procrastinating, then the lack of meaningful consequences allows procrastination to become more frequent. This last example demonstrates an interaction effect between psychological and social factors.
A Lotus Blooms in Muddy Water
Don’t despair! With the light of clarity and wisdom, you too can gain insight into what lifts your mood, improves productivity, and gives you a sense of comfort and ease.
It is beneficial to perceive your mind like a lotus seed in muddy water. The seed is not afraid or resentful of the muddy water. Instead, it understands the mud provides nutrients it needs to sprout and flourish.
Eventually, the seed blooms into a beautiful lotus, unsoiled by the mud surrounding it. Similarly, our mind can bloom like the lotus.
If we observe our difficulties, conflicts, and stress as mud, we can then perceive them as nutrients to fuel our own growth and transformation.
Therapist, Guide, Friend
You are not alone in your journey of mental health and well-being. The process of blooming, or becoming your best self, requires consistent support and expert guidance.
I am here to help you on this journey. As a therapist, I will help you explore and understand your complex past and your difficult present. As a guide, I will help you discover your values and lead you down your preferred path. As a friend, I will support you on this journey until you can sustain your own peace, happiness, and well-being.
Once you develop a resilient and balanced mind, you will also gain the experience and wisdom to manage your own stress. With sufficient experience, you may even guide others with the wisdom you have gained.